Monday, April 4, 2011

The Society of Me (people)

Far up in the north lies Ogrenose, one of the three Ogreprovinces, famous for having the Talltops running through it. It was often said that Ogrenose got its name from the mountain range, that supposedly formed the silhouette of a nose. But other sources told stories of a proud people living up there, strutting about with their noses high up in the air - hence the name.

Being the experienced traveller that he were, Billobi didn't really pay much attention to these rumours since they most often were told in the two other Ogreprovinces; it was like asking your enemy to say some nice words about you.

One particular evening, after hours on a horseback, Billobi finally got to sit down at one of the many local pubs in Ogresole. It was fairly crowded, but a group of people in the middle of the room seemed to be the centre of attention. Billobi asked the women sitting next to him what it was all about.

"Them me-ers", she told him and shook her head.

"Excuse me?"

"Me-ers! Them, all of them! Tiring to listen to. More wisdom from a cat, you get. Pfft!"

"What does that mean? 'Me-ers'?"

"Me!" she shouted. "Me-ers. Them. Interested in one thing, those. Therefore: me-ers. Me, me, me. Pfft! Should just roll in them laughing stones here instead!"

Billobi turned his attention to the group in the middle instead. It was hard to tell them apart; neither clothes nor physical features revealed anything about them. Everyone moved and talked in the same manner, with their arms waving and eyes rolling.

"...and obviously, YOU have never been there - by the look on your so called face!" one in the group responded, but it was unclear to whom.

"Clearly, after counting your poor followers on my ONE hand, you're not in ANY condition to..." another voice bellowed.

"What ECHO from the bottom of the well reaches my delicate ear? Why, isn't that the petty squabbling from lesser beings who actually COUNT supporters? I stand above that, thank you."

"Surely, if you stood above that you wouldn't even need to acknowledge the faint BREEZE that is..."

"Most definitely, that's you farting, my wee servant!"

"How refreshingly for you, to stand in both my shadow AND my history! But you're used to that, aren't you, mmm? Let me refresh that for you!"

After listening to the meaningless dispute for a couple of minutes, Billobi finished his Horsehead's Stout quickly and sat off in the night to find another inn.


  1. Hilarious! Thanks for this. :)

  2. I like the me-ers and I hope to see more of them. They are a fascinating lot those kind of people. Reminds of "Nobility" in a way. Full of themselves to the point where it gets entertaining.

  3. Thank you Antypants! Yes they are quite the fancy-pants.

  4. That's great! Reminds me of a few gamers I know longer play with. ;-)

  5. LoneIslander: thank you.

    Runjikol: thank you. Yes they do remind me of quite a few people I've known!